The Seasons

Right now I'm not at a job I necessarily am enthused about. Working in retail for the rest of my life doesn't sound like my ideal position, but I'm always trying to remind myself that I'm where I need to be for the moment. Every day I make as valid an attempt I can at asking God to show me why I'm where I am. To help me endure the rough days and to praise Him for the good ones.

Yesterday, two good things happened.

The first of which was, three of my customers asked me about my necklace. I have a crown of thorns necklace that I've had since the year the Passion of the Christ came out. When I was younger (and even now), I'd had cross necklaces, but they always felt empty to me. The world had lost the understanding, the weight behind what the cross meant. How it could be beautiful and awful at the same time. I liked them enough, but I wanted something different. Something people would ask about.

I've taken to wearing the necklace every day at work. Just something small (like my promise ring), that can set me apart and maybe, just maybe, help witness to others. I'm sure I fail on a regular basis. But I still try.

Then yesterday, those three customers asked what it was. It opened the doorway for short conversations with each of them. One was definitely a believer, while one was obviously not. The last person that asked me was a woman who was faxing the death certificate of her best friend and sister-in-law.

I can only hope that somehow my brief talks with each of them helped them in some way.

The other good thing that happened was: I got a job nibble. One of my customers (not only is the mom to a once-fellow associate), has to clients that are editors for magazines. One of them is interested in me. So last night I emailed off my resume to her. I'm excited to see what happens with it. Because working retail, while it's great to have a job right now, is not what I want to be doing for the rest of my life. There's far too much I want to accomplish outside of these cramped walls and massive windows.

So wish me luck. And prayer. Prayer is always a good thing in times like these.

Currently Editing: Genesis
Currently Reading: The Once and Future King by T.H. White
Currently Listening to: "Promise" by Thomas Bergersen

Inspiration

I think most writers strive for one of a few things: some level of acceptance of their stories (and by extension, themselves), self-actualization, and to inspire others.

At least, that's what I think. The truly greatest writers weren't writing because they wanted to be looked at as the greatest. They were writing stories they liked and they wanted to drive others to do something extraordinary. Even if that extraordinary thing might simply to be to save a seat for someone on a bus. Personally, I really want to inspire people.

I want my stories to make people sit back and go, "That was great. I want to write a story like that/draw a picture based on this/write a song about this/etc." To fuel someone else's creativity would be fantastic. Additionally, if I could help someone realize their talent, well, then that's phenomenal.

Once again, I count myself blessed. See, I've already attained that goal of mine. In a few ways, but among which is that this past weekend, one of my friends gave me a drawing she did based on my book. Then she went into a long talk about how she has all of these other drawings she wants to do of scenes from my books. It's crazy enough that a year ago, she wrote me a poem based on the first book, but to know that she's still becoming inspired to now draw things from the stories...that's just...

Indescribable. It's awesome and wonderful and gives me this great fuzzy feeling. I guess it's what reaching a goal feels like. To arrive at a finish line you didn't really know existed. It was this thing that floated around in space that I knew would be cool, but I never actually assumed it would reach some level of actuality.

I guess I'm just lucky.

In other news, I completed Camp Nano. For the next month, I plan on spending my free time editor hunting. Or...terrifyingly enough, possibly using CreateSpace to self-publish. Oh the possibilities.

Currently Writing: Zero Point
Currently Reading: Auralia's Colors by Jeffrey Overstreet
Currently Listening to: "Pharaoh's Throne" by LittleKuriboh