Quotes

I keep a quote book.

Sometimes people might wonder why. But surprisingly enough, there seem to be a lot of people who keep one. At least, during their college years. I like them though. I've done copying down quotes since High School. I've never published them, nor do I want to. They're not meant to be taken out of context or heard by strangers. They're supposed to be heard and remembered by those who were present for the initial saying. At least, mine are. Some of them can stand alone.

That's where this all comes in. I'll post here, a few comments friends have said that I thought were good and can stand along without context. Many will be omitted because, well, they're personal. Or, when taken out of context, we sound like raving total lunatics. To avoid sounding like we need to be thrown into the loony bin, I'll stick to the ones that can be on their own.

I hope these bring as much fun to you as they do to me.

The first group are singular comments. The following clusters are little conversations.

“Holy gorgeous!” – Alaina
“’Cause if you happen to be choking in this room full of hundreds of people, you really should know how to do the self administered Heimlich maneuver.” – Kara
“Do you realize that when you speak out loud, everyone can hear you?” – Shelly

“Where’s Jesus when you need him?” – Dusty Jo

“My dad said I should use my brain all the time. Not just take it out and play with it every once in a while.” – Shelly

“It’s quarter till tomorrow.” – Dana

“I told you there were cons to having a husband you can’t chain to a wall!” – Kara

“I’m not gonna lie, that nightgown is hideous.” – Alaina

“You’re not nice when you’re rude.” – Marisa

“Hell did not turn over; today’s gonna be a good day.” – Alaina

“I need to train my brain to say, ‘no, you’re not actually hungry. You’re just bored’.” – Shelly

“The only time my foot is out of my mouth is when I change feet.” – Megan

“Well, the correct answer always is the Bible.” – Professor Woolsey

“Snapple is a taste of heaven in a world that smells like hell.” – Marisa

“Just because you’re alone right now in terms of a relationship doesn’t mean that you’re less than what you could be.” – Me

“Mr. Bug, are you on the inside or the outside? You are on the inside; you must die. [Pause] If only there were something to squish you with.” – Shelly

“That is so a fictional story. A runt of the litter will never grow to be as big as your house.” – Marisa

“Bad guys always walk softly and carry a deep voice.” – Janelle

“Bublē. If you say it backwards it’s LeBoob.” – Amy

“You’re a breeder! You must understand the art of nuzzling!” – Shelly

“Come to the gutter! We have coins and gum!” – Amy

“Communication in Disney movies sucks! If he’d just said, ‘I gotta go give this to the other bad guys so I’m not a bad guy anymore’, then she’d have known!” – Dana

“Don’t worry Shelly, when you’re pregnant we’ll all be really supportive and encouraging. And whenever you walk somewhere, we’ll walk behind you and quack…like ducks.” – Kara

“Stop quoting me in your stupid book!”  - Eric

“Four am is bad, but six is ungodly. Six is man’s hour. You should wait until seven, God’s hour.” – Janelle

“I wanna be able to say, ‘I was in a room full of Muppets and we were all laughing and singing.” – Eric

“Why do you guys always wait until we’re in public to act crazy?” – Dana

“Is it bad that I feel like I don’t have homework?” – Me

“Water doesn’t usually kill you unless you drown.” – Janelle

“What’s a deer with no eyes? A no idear.” – Billy

“I have a crunch bar! How could I be unhappy?” – Me

“Where’s the absentee father?” – Kara

“Still absentee.” - Shelly

“Can I turn on the lights? Or is that a cardinal sin?” – Shelly

[Turns on the lights]

“Aghh!” – All

“I vote sin!” – Dusty Jo

“You shouldn’t inhale liquids.” – Kara

“It causes pneumonia!” – Shelly

“In severe cases, it also causes death!”

“Why’s it called a tractor beam?” – Marisa

“I dunno. Maybe it’s ‘cause they pick up so many cows, every now and then they pick up a tractor.” – Shelly

“You just have to puree your food.” – Kara

“What does puree mean? Is that a fragrance thing?” – Eric

“No, that would be popure.” – Shelly

“You’re getting paid to work?” – Karida

“Most people get paid to work.” – Me

“Has anyone noticed that Victoria’s Secret dresses look like oversized potato bags?” – Marisa

“You do realize you go to a Christian college, right?” – Shelly

“I hadn’t sleeped, sleepen. Mmm!” – Shelly

“Perhaps you should sleepen now.” – Me

“I feel like we’re being blasphemous!” – Shelly

“You’re being blasphemous. I’m doing homework.” – Janelle

“There are plants that live in winter!” – Kara

“Like cactus!” – Me

“And fir trees.” – Kara

“Which are also prickly.” – Shelly

“Better to be prickly and alive than soft and dead.” – Kara

“I retract my previous statement.” – Me

“And replace it with ‘your mother’.” – Amy

“What’s with the cloak?” – Me

“It’s my cape of modesty!” – Amy

“Are you okay over there? I feel like you just keep starting sentences, only to quickly end them.” – Me

“I’m just. It’s been. Yeah.” – Janelle