I pondered this question as I strolled into work today. As the rain began to fall on an abnormally warm day, I just began to wonder, in the grand scheme of things, what's the point? Why waste so much time, energy and overall stress on working at school, a job, getting money, etc, when in the end, none of it matters? I am going to die one day. I've accepted that fact and almost, in a way, welcome it. When I die, I'll go to heaven and live for eternity - so why work my butt off earning money that will not follow me into the real life I've been destined to lead?
These are the things I think about on a daily basis. I know; I'm kind of screwed up.
It's just that I don't understand the idea God's got behind me working so hard at school and spending all of my energies towards working so as to be able to pay off said school bills only to have it one day, ultimately, amount to nothing? I know this question will never be answered. I'll probably wonder about it endlessly until the day my heart decides to stop pumping blood into my brain. It's one of the things I can probably never, truly, grasp.
As a human being, I suppose we're just too stupid to understand our own purpose. Our own meaning behind our actions. Finding solace in the fact that God does is enough I guess. I'm just too stupid to admit that it is enough that He's got a better idea what's going on than I do.
As I've said in past entries, I really have come to enjoy TV shows like Bones, Heroes, and Fringe. As I watch these shows, I just have to wonder, do these people, that I sit down to watch on TV every week, ever grapple with the same questions I do? Do they ever contemplate their soul and what it means? Do they ever wonder what'll happen when they die?
I like to think that, eventually, the thought pops into people's heads where they think, "I'm gonna die one day. I wonder what'll happen". But the reality, I suppose, is that most people just don't care. They're content with the here and now and don't want to think too far ahead.
I just wonder how they survive like that.
"I have to poke you a couple of times first. And then when you didn't wake up, that's when I yelled Billy."
"I'll just say, 'Hi, my name's Susan, and I'm a robot'."
"Here's your new name tag." [holds up a piece of paper that says "Big Mouth]
"Hey! Jack of all trades, master of none!"
"Get happy."
"Football players should not have their heads chopped off and continue to play."
"How hard is it to write about yourself?"
"Oh, kajoodles!"
"So, apparently, three things all sound the same; trains, tornadoes, and a raging inferno."
"So what, it's the Father, the Son, and the Niece?"
"Who knows, maybe they [The Trinity] all have special names for one another. Maybe Jesus' special name is...Harry."
"Hey, God loves tone def people!"
"There's no brownie in this brownie."
"And then there's a song in between. It's like a good musical."
"A giant Jesus will come and stomp on people."
"It's only a lie if people believe what you say is the truth."
"Man, I wish I had footnotes."
"I just like how it says, 'the terrible wrath of God, who, by the way, lives forever and ever'."
"You'll love me dangit."
"I walk around and say, 'Hey Mac Daddy'! And no one knows what I'm talking about."
"It's the Devil's Bible?"
"It's the evil Bible."
"What, does it go 'muahaha' when you open it?"
"Everyone knows the song of Moses. In Heaven you kind of just know."
"Yeah, the worship leaders get their guitars and lead us in singing."
"It's kind of like in movies when everyone starts singing along - because they all know the words - and when the song ends everyone goes back to like, sweeping."
"It's the second book."
"That's the beginning."
"No, the beginning is Genesis. Hence the name."
"That's what causes people to commit suicide."
"Migranes?"
"Why do you think no one's allowed in the temple?"
"'Cause it's filled with smoke?"
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