Stunted

Ever feel like you just stepped backwards? And I don't mean by like, one step. I mean more like eight years.

I guess the word "oppressed" is right, even though it sounds so horribly wrong. Never have I ever wanted to feel that a word so strong as that should describe how I feel about home. I guess I want to be an adult. I want to grow up and move on and move out. I'm sick of feeling stuck and trapped.

So how do I change that? The problem is, I like the people I work with. I don't want to get a new job because I'd miss hanging out with them. But, I know I can't stay where I am. Not financially. It sucks, I hate saying that, but I think it's what needs to be done. If I could make more money, then I could move out and get my own place and, for once, I could feel like I wasn't a child anymore.

It drives me mad that I don't have my own place. Most days it doesn't bother me, but then there are days like today, where I just kind of want to scream and run away and never come back until I have my own place and can look my parents in the eyes and say, "I'm fine. I've got this. You don't need to see me as twelve anymore."

Maybe that's what it'll take.

Random angry post tonight. Shouldn't be, seeing as the rest of my day was a great adventure. Well, here's hoping that you have a grand adventure tonight. Or tomorrow. Whenever it is for you.

Currently Writing: Zero Point
Currently Listening to: "Hide and Seek" by Imogen Heap