There are lots of reasons why I don't want to spend my life working in retail. One of the most absurd is this theory some people have that because you're wearing a uniform for the store they're in, they can treat you like absolute garbage.
Today, I got to experience this again.
Not only did I deal with a customer that was so rude I wanted to punch her, but she was wrong the entire time she was there. Insisting that her ink that we advised she purchase (a high-yield cartridge), didn't fit into her printer, she demanded a refund, a discount on the "right" cartridge, and reimbursement for her time and money because she had to drive back. Okay. No big deal. Sure, we can handle that.
Then she not only called one of my coworkers dumb (at least three times that I heard), but she also told him to shut up twice (forcefully and then with wide eyes said to me, "God bless him, I swear!"). I almost yelled at her, "Get out."
No one says that to my friend. Coworker or otherwise. If I had been a manager, I would have told her to leave and never come back. I wasn't thinking of repercussions, so I might have been fired.
How arrogant can you be to completely demean someone else and call them dumb? How selfish and close-minded can you be to tell someone to shut up that you don't even know that is only trying to help you? My hands were shaking as I rang through her return and I tried my best to not talk. 'Cause I knew I would say something that would "get me in trouble."
People like that make my anxiety level fly through the roof. My stomach gets in knots and my body trembles. I want to yell at these people in anger. How dare they act that way? Don't they realize that words hurt? Don't they realize that everyone has something they deal with every day? How do you know your dialogue with someone won't drive them over the edge?
Look, this is one of the few things that I firmly believe in and I think everyone should hear. Treat others with as much respect and love as you can offer. Even if you don't know them. Even if you don't like them. Even if it kind of hurts you and you have to force it out. You might be the only opportunity to save someone's life.
Sunday, May 26, 2013
Thursday, May 23, 2013
Kick in the Pants
Sometimes you just need that smack upside the head to remind you what you were made for.
Sure, there are lots of things you can do. Talents and skills and abilities. Sure, there are roles we all fill throughout the day that sometimes put us into double digits on our hat wearing capabilities. Teacher, leader, role model, boss, employee, technician, sales person, CEO, print master, game player, etc. The list goes on and on and on.
But then there's that one thing. That one thing you were made for.
I'm a believer in the fact that everyone was made with some specific thing that they are gonna do. There's something, I don't know what, that you and you alone can accomplish. A task to perform, a role to play, a life to change. And only you can do it.
Personally, I got re-awakened to my own personal "one thing" this past week. So I'm dusting off the writer's block and I'm getting back to the grind. I'm preparing myself for sleepless nights and long days. The biggest thing I need to ensure I prepare myself for is the battle I know I'm going to face: laziness. It's so easy after a long day to justify to myself that I need "me time". Time to sit and do absolutely nothing.
Well, there was a time when "me time" was the same as "writing time". I think it's high time I got back to that mentality.
I don't know what your one thing is. All I do know is that whatever it is, you're gonna be epic.
Sure, there are lots of things you can do. Talents and skills and abilities. Sure, there are roles we all fill throughout the day that sometimes put us into double digits on our hat wearing capabilities. Teacher, leader, role model, boss, employee, technician, sales person, CEO, print master, game player, etc. The list goes on and on and on.
But then there's that one thing. That one thing you were made for.
I'm a believer in the fact that everyone was made with some specific thing that they are gonna do. There's something, I don't know what, that you and you alone can accomplish. A task to perform, a role to play, a life to change. And only you can do it.
Personally, I got re-awakened to my own personal "one thing" this past week. So I'm dusting off the writer's block and I'm getting back to the grind. I'm preparing myself for sleepless nights and long days. The biggest thing I need to ensure I prepare myself for is the battle I know I'm going to face: laziness. It's so easy after a long day to justify to myself that I need "me time". Time to sit and do absolutely nothing.
Well, there was a time when "me time" was the same as "writing time". I think it's high time I got back to that mentality.
I don't know what your one thing is. All I do know is that whatever it is, you're gonna be epic.
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
The End
Ever feel like you just can't do anymore? That you're simply done, and it doesn't matter how hard you fight or how long you struggle or how well you perform. It's finished. You're tired and sick and broken and you don't want to hear the excuses anymore. You just want whatever is supposed to happen to happen and to move on from the growing pit of anxiety and fear and depression that swells in your stomach.
Every day, I go to work and I try my hardest. I do what I can. It might not always be the best and I might not always do what someone high up in the stratosphere thinks I should do, but I do what I can. I attempt to smile and laugh. I try to offer encouragement to my coworkers. I keep my mouth shut to the best of my ability and I try to remain optimistic.
Y'know what sucks? Reality.
When I was young, I had this great idea that somehow, in some way, I might help change lives. That somehow I was gonna get published and that somehow, it would be something to someone. As I get older and as I struggle more against the world I find myself living in, I reach boiling points.
Today I reached a boiling point.
What do I do? What am I expected to do? Everyone tells me what they want, what they claim their ideal is. But when I stop and look around, I see those who aren't even trying reaping far more benefits then I could ever imagine. What have I done? How did I go wrong this time?
Will no one tell me what I did wrong? And can the reasons you give please be legitimate and not some on-the-spot, sorry-you-caught-me-with-my-pants-down excuse?
I hope your adventures have been better than mine was today. Gosh does Satan know how to attack harshly, even when I feel most prepared.
Currently Reading: Brisinger by Christopher Paolini
Currently Listening to: "Beautiful Things" by Gungor
Every day, I go to work and I try my hardest. I do what I can. It might not always be the best and I might not always do what someone high up in the stratosphere thinks I should do, but I do what I can. I attempt to smile and laugh. I try to offer encouragement to my coworkers. I keep my mouth shut to the best of my ability and I try to remain optimistic.
Y'know what sucks? Reality.
When I was young, I had this great idea that somehow, in some way, I might help change lives. That somehow I was gonna get published and that somehow, it would be something to someone. As I get older and as I struggle more against the world I find myself living in, I reach boiling points.
Today I reached a boiling point.
What do I do? What am I expected to do? Everyone tells me what they want, what they claim their ideal is. But when I stop and look around, I see those who aren't even trying reaping far more benefits then I could ever imagine. What have I done? How did I go wrong this time?
Will no one tell me what I did wrong? And can the reasons you give please be legitimate and not some on-the-spot, sorry-you-caught-me-with-my-pants-down excuse?
I hope your adventures have been better than mine was today. Gosh does Satan know how to attack harshly, even when I feel most prepared.
Currently Reading: Brisinger by Christopher Paolini
Currently Listening to: "Beautiful Things" by Gungor
Friday, May 17, 2013
Someone Write This For Me!
Seriously, someone just write my query letter for me.
Selling myself has never been my strong suit. I'll sell my books till kingdom come, but the moment someone then begins to ask about my qualifications and how I'm fitted to write, I become a stammering mess. Even just writing it out for the query has been rough. I think I've utilized the backspace far more frequently then I've ever anticipated.
After all this time, I thought for sure that writing a one page query letter would be easy as pie. It's basically End Game: Condensed. Like the back of a book cover. A brief synopsis and a smigin about yourself, the author.
Why does anyone want to know about me in the first place?
I want to write because I've got this silly epic story in my head, not 'cause I want people to care about me. If I wanted attention, I would have done like, music or something. God knows I can sing (when I want to). So why does anyone need to know about me? I'm just the one splattering words against a screen and then holding it up yelling, "I MAED DIS."
Yes, I did just become slightly stupid. Because that's how I feel sometimes. Sometimes I feel like the otter in that meme, screaming to the world, "LOOK. Now do something with it please!" Only I don't think otters say please.
In other news, my sister graduates from college on Saturday.
Epic adventuring to all! And to all a good night!
Currently Reading: Brisinger by Christopher Paolini
Currently Listening to: "Paperman" by Christope Beck
Selling myself has never been my strong suit. I'll sell my books till kingdom come, but the moment someone then begins to ask about my qualifications and how I'm fitted to write, I become a stammering mess. Even just writing it out for the query has been rough. I think I've utilized the backspace far more frequently then I've ever anticipated.
After all this time, I thought for sure that writing a one page query letter would be easy as pie. It's basically End Game: Condensed. Like the back of a book cover. A brief synopsis and a smigin about yourself, the author.
Why does anyone want to know about me in the first place?
I want to write because I've got this silly epic story in my head, not 'cause I want people to care about me. If I wanted attention, I would have done like, music or something. God knows I can sing (when I want to). So why does anyone need to know about me? I'm just the one splattering words against a screen and then holding it up yelling, "I MAED DIS."
Yes, I did just become slightly stupid. Because that's how I feel sometimes. Sometimes I feel like the otter in that meme, screaming to the world, "LOOK. Now do something with it please!" Only I don't think otters say please.
In other news, my sister graduates from college on Saturday.
Epic adventuring to all! And to all a good night!
Currently Reading: Brisinger by Christopher Paolini
Currently Listening to: "Paperman" by Christope Beck
Thursday, May 16, 2013
Adventure!
Guess what world? My friend Kate Hasbrouck is a published author! Or at least, she will be soon =)
I just think everyone should know that. I also think everyone should keep their eyes out and should buy it when it hits shelves! 'Cause it's awesome. It's beyond awesome. It's her story! And it's great!
That's all.
Currently Reading: Brisinger by Christopher Paolini
Currently Listening to: "Paperman" by Christope Beck
I just think everyone should know that. I also think everyone should keep their eyes out and should buy it when it hits shelves! 'Cause it's awesome. It's beyond awesome. It's her story! And it's great!
That's all.
Currently Reading: Brisinger by Christopher Paolini
Currently Listening to: "Paperman" by Christope Beck
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
I'm Slightly Ridiculous
Tonight as I walked back from Wawa, carrying four coffees for myself and coworkers, I began to wonder just how much it would cost to invest in a Keurig for the store I work at.
So what have I just spent the last half hour doing? Researching the three different types of Keurigs available and debating on whether I can justify purchasing one for my store. I'm not joking - I'm seriously considering doing this. It would save everyone so much money, especially if I went with the Vue version - 'cause it'll do just about anything. The downside is, these things aren't cheap at the onset.
Naturally, this brings out the grocery shopper in me.
When I was younger, I always accompanied my mom on her trips to the grocery store. In doing this I not only got to spend some quality time with my mom, but I also learned the finer points of bargain shopping and how to figure out what the best deal is in the long run. Sure, we might not need a ten pound bag of rice right this instant, but rice lasts a while and we will use it.
How does this apply to buying a Keurig? Let me tell you.
Tonight I spent ten dollars on coffee. That's a tiny amount in the grand scheme of things, but let's look at it this way. If my three coworkers buy two coffees every day, that means that just the three of them are spending approximately ten dollars every day on coffee. And that's just from Wawa. That's not counting what they may be brewing at home. So then add in the several other coworkers that I know purchase a good bit of coffee every day from Wawa. You're now talking close to twenty dollars a day. Multiply that by five (assuming this habit is only fully encouraged while at work), and you get one hundred dollars.
A Vue Keurig costs approximately $250. Even factoring in purchasing a package of 75 qty capsule thingies, you've only bumped up the total to around $325. All that's left is to add water and maybe milk. Assuming we drink lots of coffee (which we do), you're maybe buying a gallon or two a week. So...seven dollars?
Methinks we need a Keurig.
Currently Reading: Brisinger by Christopher Paolini ('cause it's about time I finish this stinking series)
Currently Listening to: "United State of Pop 2012" by DJ Earworm
So what have I just spent the last half hour doing? Researching the three different types of Keurigs available and debating on whether I can justify purchasing one for my store. I'm not joking - I'm seriously considering doing this. It would save everyone so much money, especially if I went with the Vue version - 'cause it'll do just about anything. The downside is, these things aren't cheap at the onset.
Naturally, this brings out the grocery shopper in me.
When I was younger, I always accompanied my mom on her trips to the grocery store. In doing this I not only got to spend some quality time with my mom, but I also learned the finer points of bargain shopping and how to figure out what the best deal is in the long run. Sure, we might not need a ten pound bag of rice right this instant, but rice lasts a while and we will use it.
How does this apply to buying a Keurig? Let me tell you.
Tonight I spent ten dollars on coffee. That's a tiny amount in the grand scheme of things, but let's look at it this way. If my three coworkers buy two coffees every day, that means that just the three of them are spending approximately ten dollars every day on coffee. And that's just from Wawa. That's not counting what they may be brewing at home. So then add in the several other coworkers that I know purchase a good bit of coffee every day from Wawa. You're now talking close to twenty dollars a day. Multiply that by five (assuming this habit is only fully encouraged while at work), and you get one hundred dollars.
A Vue Keurig costs approximately $250. Even factoring in purchasing a package of 75 qty capsule thingies, you've only bumped up the total to around $325. All that's left is to add water and maybe milk. Assuming we drink lots of coffee (which we do), you're maybe buying a gallon or two a week. So...seven dollars?
Methinks we need a Keurig.
Currently Reading: Brisinger by Christopher Paolini ('cause it's about time I finish this stinking series)
Currently Listening to: "United State of Pop 2012" by DJ Earworm
Thursday, May 2, 2013
Sometimes I Want to Punch Past Me
I don't talk well.
Unless I'm super comfortable with someone, I just don't communicate my opinions, beliefs and views very well. I can communicate - don't get me wrong. I'm stellar at telling people the facts about things. But the moment I need to stand up for myself, my beliefs, my thoughts, my actions, whatever, I flounder and sputter and for some reason, my mind goes absolutely blank.
This is a primary reason why I'm perfectly content listening and not talking. Especially to good talkers. People that are excellent at always conveying how they think, feel or whatever captivate me. It's as though I think that by listening to them constantly I'll somehow learn how to do what they do. But regardless of it all, I somehow lose all semblance of intelligence during these situations of deep conversations about, well, anything.
My mind sort of goes white and the slew of thoughts I always have fade into obscurity when I try to recall capable opinions. I find myself saying "um", "uh" and "well", a lot. Conviction is not something I'm good at speaking with. It's in my arsenal - I know it is. I can do it when I'm with someone I'm comfortable with. I have spoken on a number of occasions with friends & family members with such conviction that I've made them rethink their views on things.
But most times, I just wind up faltering. Inevitably, I hate past me for being so incoherent. Why couldn't I have just said this instead of that? Why did I keep trying? What was my goal in saying that? Seriously, that was the best I could come up with? Why am I having better answers to so-and-so's questions now then I did when we were actually talking?
This frustration causes not only a great deal of stress on my life, but it also makes me feel really regretful. I know that I haven't done the person I was talking to justice at all and I wind up feeling inadequate. I know I'm intelligent (sometimes). But when these situations arise, I find myself feeling like a frightened child that doesn't know right from wrong or up from down. What's two plus two? I feel like I can't even answer that question when I'm put in these situations.
Then whomever I'm talking to thinks I get mad at them, when I just get mad at myself. 'Cause I can't talk well.
How do you prepare yourself at all times to be ready for these sorts of things, regardless of who you're talking to or where? Is it possible to become more steadfast in that ability? Or are some people just unable to do what I find so incredibly awesome - speak with conviction about everything you believe in. Why can't that just be in my skill set?
...
Wow, this was a whole lot more ranty than I had intended.
In other news, Camp Nano was completed by the skin of my teeth and I'm not happy with any of it, but I got another 50k words written. That means something, right?
Hope your adventures have been less harrowing than my own! I kind of want to redo this past week.
Currently Listening to: "A Thousand Years" The Piano Guys cover
Unless I'm super comfortable with someone, I just don't communicate my opinions, beliefs and views very well. I can communicate - don't get me wrong. I'm stellar at telling people the facts about things. But the moment I need to stand up for myself, my beliefs, my thoughts, my actions, whatever, I flounder and sputter and for some reason, my mind goes absolutely blank.
This is a primary reason why I'm perfectly content listening and not talking. Especially to good talkers. People that are excellent at always conveying how they think, feel or whatever captivate me. It's as though I think that by listening to them constantly I'll somehow learn how to do what they do. But regardless of it all, I somehow lose all semblance of intelligence during these situations of deep conversations about, well, anything.
My mind sort of goes white and the slew of thoughts I always have fade into obscurity when I try to recall capable opinions. I find myself saying "um", "uh" and "well", a lot. Conviction is not something I'm good at speaking with. It's in my arsenal - I know it is. I can do it when I'm with someone I'm comfortable with. I have spoken on a number of occasions with friends & family members with such conviction that I've made them rethink their views on things.
But most times, I just wind up faltering. Inevitably, I hate past me for being so incoherent. Why couldn't I have just said this instead of that? Why did I keep trying? What was my goal in saying that? Seriously, that was the best I could come up with? Why am I having better answers to so-and-so's questions now then I did when we were actually talking?
This frustration causes not only a great deal of stress on my life, but it also makes me feel really regretful. I know that I haven't done the person I was talking to justice at all and I wind up feeling inadequate. I know I'm intelligent (sometimes). But when these situations arise, I find myself feeling like a frightened child that doesn't know right from wrong or up from down. What's two plus two? I feel like I can't even answer that question when I'm put in these situations.
Then whomever I'm talking to thinks I get mad at them, when I just get mad at myself. 'Cause I can't talk well.
How do you prepare yourself at all times to be ready for these sorts of things, regardless of who you're talking to or where? Is it possible to become more steadfast in that ability? Or are some people just unable to do what I find so incredibly awesome - speak with conviction about everything you believe in. Why can't that just be in my skill set?
...
Wow, this was a whole lot more ranty than I had intended.
In other news, Camp Nano was completed by the skin of my teeth and I'm not happy with any of it, but I got another 50k words written. That means something, right?
Hope your adventures have been less harrowing than my own! I kind of want to redo this past week.
Currently Listening to: "A Thousand Years" The Piano Guys cover
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