Rewrite

The next edition of my book needs to be written. Either that or I need to find a way to get in touch with people in hollywood to get the idea rolling. Because I just don't have enough time in the day to write it right now - dang it all.

Jon and Josh's birthday was today, which was fun. I was able to get off work, thankfully, to enjoy the family dinner and then attempting to go out bowling with the guys, Niki, Mallory, Rebecca, Kevin and Elissa. After bowling fell through, we went back home to go about playing a game that I was, basically, terrible at.

Next in line is Nancy, who turns 19 and has been accepted to college at Messiah college. Lord willing, I'll be accepted to Houghton and not be left behind. I think I'd be forced to move out or something in order to keep myself feeling at all the age I am.

This week is spring break, thank goodness. Which equates to me being given the opportunity to sleep a bit. Take tomorrow, for example, I plan on sleeping until nine and then writing - or trying to write - until noon. Eating lunch, then writing again until about four when mom and I will be going shopping for dresses for the wedding.

Yes, the wedding - in less than two weeks. Oh gosh, where'd the time go??

My brain feels like goo. Whenever I get an idea, I don't know, exactly, how to get it down on paper. I've been reading over notes my brother's have left me regarding the first draft of my book and I find it interesting - their comments anyway. Josh's are very uplifting, saying that I've got brilliant writing, some things are really good, while Jon was tearing the book apart. Josh did too, but in less harsh ways.

I find it intriguing. And refreshing, to know that they can be honest with me about my writing and my concepts. Granted, I am only twenty years old and it is my first shot at anything resembling a novel. I hope to anything that this book can be what I see in my head, but I don't know if it'll be what I keep praying for.

I've got some growing up to do first.

I've gotta get going. It's about time for bed. After - of course - watching Star Trek trailers to pass the time until May (Because it's so far away!).

For now, goodnight!

"College is like war. There are periods of complete and utter panic followed by a mass of time filled with tedium."

"So, radiation doesn't have a half life after all."
"It has a half a half a half life."

"Bananas are going extinct. Natural bananas. We eat too much apparently."
"But bananas will still be around right? It's not like in a couple of years I'll walk into a store and ask for banans and be told, 'sorry, they're extinct'."

"My dad is driving one mile an hour under the speed limit in protest of the liberals. He claims that driving that slow is the same as taking away liberals drugs, cappuccinos and abortions. I don't know how, but that's his logic."

"Guys keeping warm is God's way of getting women near them."

"A Swedish massage? They basically beat you up."

Fans. Horrid Fans

As you know, I, am a nerd.

Currently, I am sitting on my computer, watching Star Trek, the original series, occasionally pausing it to watch trailers and interviews for Star Trek XI, coming out in less than two months. I read through blogs, comments on videos, and random sayings on the internet of fans regarding the new movie. Half are relatively open to the new movie by J.J. Abrams, (who, by the way, has never messed anything up), while the other half whine, complain and moan about how terrible it'll be.

Some fans then continue to go on about how any true fan would never watch this movie because it's nothing like the original series. Others go on to say that it's going to be nothing more than a flashy, CGI enhanced movie without any real plot or storyline. They say they'll boycott it by not going to see the movie, by not endorsing it in any fashion.

I want to grab through my computer and smack these people.

I understand; okay? I'm a fan too. Yes, it's not going to be the original series - that's impossible. No matter how much you wish it, it can't be done. But for the love of Christ, please, do not be ignorant and instead, be open to the idea of a new movie, a new take on an old and loved classic. The movie isn't even out yet! If you judge it before it's given the chance to fly, then how is it expected to be anything more than your preconceived ideas?

They'll go to the movie, watch it, and critique it as if they have any power over anything. People like that make me really frustrated. Who are they to condemn a movie? An idea? And upon walking out of this movie will claim it was just as bad as they said and they were right. Then they'll go on to claim that anyone that does like the movie was never a fan - not a true one.

What is a fan then? As fans, people to watch the show and fall in love with it's premise and characters, are we not supposed to be open to any road that the franchise may take us? To continue it and bring it into a new era? A new generation for others to fall in love with, as we once did?

I'd like to think that, as a fan, I should be open to any new movie, or premise, that may come along before I say it was terrible. You can never judge a movie based off of the trailer. It's impossible. I just went to see Watchmen and decided that it fell far shorter than the original graphic novel. But that's just me. Someone else out there will embrace it fully and say it's the best movie ever. Will I condemn the movie and make them feel inferior for liking it? No. That would be, above all things, childish.

This isn't a theory I have based solely off of the Star Trek fans, but the Stargate fans as well. As very few people outside of the Science Fiction universe know, Stargate Atlantis was canceled and instead, a new series is green lit and going to be continuing the franchise. And fans are saying the exact same things regarding Stargate Universe as they are Star Trek XI. What's worse is that Universe hasn't even got a trailer or spoiler to defend itself with! It's in preproduction. And already people are saying it will be the worst thing ever.

It's something that really gets me saddened when I see someone who claims to be a fan of a show their whole life blowing off it's evolution solely because it doesn't fit their idea of what it is. They are one out of a million fans, all of whom have very little control over the overall outcome. The only thing we can do, as fans, is to either make it as great as it could be, or let it drown. If most fans listen to those nay-sayers, and don't go to the movie, yes, it will sink, and quickly. But if we are open to it, it could be the greatest thing to happen to Star Trek in years. Leonard Nimoy and William Shatner have given this movie their blessing - perhaps you should too.

And what's with saying the casting was wrong?

Give them a chance. Give them as actors - who do this for a living - a chance to show you what they can do. Do not be blinded by your own ideals and say that they were wrong. If you do harbor ill feelings regarding the new movie, keep them to yourself until the movie actually comes out. Please, for the sake of those with hope.

*Sigh*

I write this as if someone will read it and say, "Yeah! I agree totally!", but I know that it will go unnoticed. I only wish people recognized what I wrote and took it to heart, but this blog is a speck among millions of others out on the internet.

So to those that did read this; give everything that happens to your favorite TV show a chance before shooting them down. If you truly are someone that lives and breathes a show, then you, as a fan, have a duty to allow it it's chances, and follow it.

But that's just me. Little ol' me.

Thoughts On Life and Death

What is the purpose?

I pondered this question as I strolled into work today. As the rain began to fall on an abnormally warm day, I just began to wonder, in the grand scheme of things, what's the point? Why waste so much time, energy and overall stress on working at school, a job, getting money, etc, when in the end, none of it matters? I am going to die one day. I've accepted that fact and almost, in a way, welcome it. When I die, I'll go to heaven and live for eternity - so why work my butt off earning money that will not follow me into the real life I've been destined to lead?

These are the things I think about on a daily basis. I know; I'm kind of screwed up.

It's just that I don't understand the idea God's got behind me working so hard at school and spending all of my energies towards working so as to be able to pay off said school bills only to have it one day, ultimately, amount to nothing? I know this question will never be answered. I'll probably wonder about it endlessly until the day my heart decides to stop pumping blood into my brain. It's one of the things I can probably never, truly, grasp.

As a human being, I suppose we're just too stupid to understand our own purpose. Our own meaning behind our actions. Finding solace in the fact that God does is enough I guess. I'm just too stupid to admit that it is enough that He's got a better idea what's going on than I do.

As I've said in past entries, I really have come to enjoy TV shows like Bones, Heroes, and Fringe. As I watch these shows, I just have to wonder, do these people, that I sit down to watch on TV every week, ever grapple with the same questions I do? Do they ever contemplate their soul and what it means? Do they ever wonder what'll happen when they die?

I like to think that, eventually, the thought pops into people's heads where they think, "I'm gonna die one day. I wonder what'll happen". But the reality, I suppose, is that most people just don't care. They're content with the here and now and don't want to think too far ahead.

I just wonder how they survive like that.

"I have to poke you a couple of times first. And then when you didn't wake up, that's when I yelled Billy." "I'll just say, 'Hi, my name's Susan, and I'm a robot'." "Here's your new name tag." [holds up a piece of paper that says "Big Mouth] "Hey! Jack of all trades, master of none!" "Get happy." "Football players should not have their heads chopped off and continue to play." "How hard is it to write about yourself?"
"Oh, kajoodles!"
"So, apparently, three things all sound the same; trains, tornadoes, and a raging inferno."
"So what, it's the Father, the Son, and the Niece?"
"Who knows, maybe they [The Trinity] all have special names for one another. Maybe Jesus' special name is...Harry."
"Hey, God loves tone def people!"
"There's no brownie in this brownie."
"And then there's a song in between. It's like a good musical."
"A giant Jesus will come and stomp on people."
"It's only a lie if people believe what you say is the truth."
"Man, I wish I had footnotes."
"I just like how it says, 'the terrible wrath of God, who, by the way, lives forever and ever'."
"You'll love me dangit."
"I walk around and say, 'Hey Mac Daddy'! And no one knows what I'm talking about."

"It's the Devil's Bible?"
"It's the evil Bible."
"What, does it go 'muahaha' when you open it?"

"Everyone knows the song of Moses. In Heaven you kind of just know."
"Yeah, the worship leaders get their guitars and lead us in singing."
"It's kind of like in movies when everyone starts singing along - because they all know the words - and when the song ends everyone goes back to like, sweeping."

"It's the second book."
"That's the beginning."
"No, the beginning is Genesis. Hence the name."

"That's what causes people to commit suicide."
"Migranes?"

"Why do you think no one's allowed in the temple?"
"'Cause it's filled with smoke?"

That Accursed Borg Mentality

Is it so much to ask for people to have their own, individual thoughts? Or must everything be a shared consciousness?

This, of course, is regarding people - customers specifically. I could be standing around, twittling my thumbs, waiting for something to do. Enjoying time to just think, maybe get some cleaning done. And then, out of the freakin' woodwork, everyone decides they need this, that and the other thing, all right now, right away. It's especially frustrating at Copy Center, and what can make it worse is when they all require different machines and time.

It's almost as if people are afraid of doing things alone. Even standing at a counter waiting for something. Everyone seems so terrified of making their own single decision, and would rather walk around aimlessly, waiting for someone else to make a decision and then follow it.

But beyond this, what drives me nuts about people is their inability to admit that they screwed up. Some customers I have to deal with, I'll do diagnostics on or a tune up that tells me I should do a data transfer or a reformat or virus removal, but then they'll say, 'no I can do it'. Then, a couple of weeks later, they'll come in, the computer's crashed, and then they yell at me.

I love it when customers tell me that their stupid moronic ability to not listen turns into me ruining their computer. Even at copy center we'll have jobs like this, where customers get angry at us because they didn't listen to our advice.

I don't get paid and come into work to lie to people. I really don't. I don't sell stuff to people in false senses of security just because I like to laugh about it later when I'm sitting in the break room. We're retail people. Me, my coworkers, my managers, we're trying to help people. But naturally, everyone, in today's society, is so worried about spending too much money that they can't listen to reason.

I wouldn't sell something I don't believe in.

*Sigh*

Anyway, what's new in my life? Absolutely nothing. I spend my time at work and school, sleep very little, and am on the verge of getting sick with whatever has circulated through the house. Next week I start a horse riding class, which I'm looking forward to, but I'm somewhat frustrated at my choice of class times. I'm barely going to have time to sleep. I know I'm going to have to put my book on hold.

That's what's frustrating. All I want to do is write my book, get it into another draft, and then eventually publish it. But I can't do that in school. Not while working thirty-five hours a week at Staples. It just doesn't seem viable. Or healthy.

I'm done for now. Gonna go watch Bones some more before going to work.

It's Been A While

My life is relatively consistent. I've been spending a good deal of time watching the TV show "Heroes", which is essentially X-Men, but in a cool TV show. And the bad guy is immensely cooler. I guess I really watch the show for the character of Sylar. If you ever watch Heroes, I recommend not thinking too much.

I was reading reviews on imbd.com to see what some people thought of the show, and too many people aren't allowing themselves the ability to just sit and watch something unfold. To be taken away and swept away in a storyline. These people that hate the show all say the same things; 'the plots are too complicated', 'the characters are too predictable', 'they spend too much time with filler', etc. etc.

What do they expect? The writers and creators are trying to make it seem like a plausible, real world scenario. Lives occasionally get boring. Little mundaine things happen in everyones lives, and in the search to find the happy medium between 'always high adrenaline', and 'realistic storylines'.

But like I said, I'm mostly watching the show for Sylar. Some of the comments say that he only ever uses the one power that he stole, rather than using all of the powers he's taken. But what people need to remember is that Sylar's kind of screwed up. The reasoning behind his ability is that he wants to see how things work. It's not so much that he wants to use the abilities he takes, (he does, but it's not the main factor), he wants to know how their brain allows it to work. That's blatently obvious in season three, episode one.

But what do I know? I love fantasy and scifi stuff regardless of whether it's good or not. However, if Heroes lasts a while, which it definitely has the potential to, then I obviously was right about the show's ability to be amazing. Yes, there are some episodes that are boring as all get out, but every series has those episodes. I mean, Stargate, in it's ten seasons, had a good twenty or thirty episodes that were dull. It happens.

I enjoy the show. It's captivating. The backstories on the chracters are the best. There are occasions that I don't care for where they're taking the chracters, but I don't have any real influence against them. I'm just a viewer.

Anyway, I could go on and on about this show, for a number of reasons. But I guess I just thought it would be best to, instead, just kind of point out that every show has it's good and bads. And too often people don't allow themselves to get caught up in the mystery of a show. More likely than not, they continually say things like, "there's no logic". No duh! Logic flies out the window when you bring anything fantasy into the mix. Reality gets slightly skewed and most of the time, logic is gone. Sometimes it stays for a while, but normally, because we are human, and because the writers try to create characters that are believable and real, they allow them to get frustrated and make the wrong decisions.

Okay, now I'm done.

Oh, and by the way, the guy who plays Sylar is pretty much gorgeous. Like I said, the main reason I watch the show. He's got the best background and the actor is amazing at portraying him. It makes me smile. Good actors seem to be in short supply anymore.